Make it so, Number One.

Prof. Stephen Hawking, the greatest mind in physics since Einstein, has finally hit the jackpot: giving legitimacy to Star Trek as viable means of extending human life.

According to the brunt of many hilarious jokes, humans must colonize other planets or face inevitable extinction on Earth. How do we get to such far off worlds? Simple: warp drive. "Science fiction has developed the idea of warp drive, which takes you instantly to your destination." This would, unfortunately, violate the scientific law that states no object can travel faster than light speed. But don't worry, Stephen Hawking is working on it. Also, the professor has admitted that he would like to travel to space before he dies.

This article is awesome for so many reasons. Firstly, Hawking made this announcement as he was preparing to accept the Copley Award, which is apparently the the oldest such accolade for scientific achievement. Had I known that saying "it'd be awesome to have warp speed so we can colonize other planets" would've gotten me a Copley, I would've been a physics major. It strikes me as bizarre that this would be so revolutionary, but clearly science isn't my forte. Furthermore, Hawking mentioned that human life will eventually end due to "astroids, or even nuclear war". See? See?? I'm not the only one who cares about nuclear war on this earth. When the ICBMs start flying, me and Steve will hop into our shuttlecraft and colonize some planet. Contact me soon and I'll reserve your spot.

I love that CNN has made this news. You can read the brilliance at: http://edition.cnn.com/2006/TECH/space/11/30/space.hawking.reut/index.html.

In other news, late word has come from Colombo that Gothabaya Rajapakse, the defense secretary and brother of President Mahinda Rajapakse, has been injured in a bomb blast. Three others were apparently wounded as well. It is fortunate that this attack failed. Mahinda unleashed a fury of airstrikes on Tamil civilian targets when General Fonseka, the head of the Sri Lankan army, was injured in a failed assassination attempt. Imagine his fury if his own brother (who, through brilliant nepotism, holds a powerful position in the government) was killed. We'll see what retaliation occurs (besides the normal, daily skirmishes in the North and East) tomorrow morning. It should make for some interesting breakfast reading.

Speaking of tomorrow...proves to be as relaxing and unproductive as today. I'll get up at 9:30 and eat some breakfast before heading to the History Department at 10:30. I'll work until noon, and then get some food. Afterwards, I HAVE to get a solid three hours of comps done. Rec center at 4:00, and then hopefully Pound will be in town so we can have some fun.